randomness: Under Bergets Rot

Found this rather entertaining animated music video by happenstance, yesterday. Finntroll, a Finnish metal band purportedly deriving its name from an old legend, combines characteristics found in death metal, folk metal, and an exclusively Finnish style of music called "humppa." Not that we're an expert on humppa, considering that we only learned of it last night, but its fast pace and folk instrumentals seem to pronounce this particular style, here.

If you're a fan of metal, as well as punk rock groups that incorporate folk music and instrumentals, like the Dropkick Murphys, we're sure that you'll also enjoy this. However, should this style of music not entertain, then the animation itself surely will. One part macabre, another part vaudeville, this is the kind of place that patrons of the weird would likely frequent. We certainly would. If there are any entrepenuers out there looking to begin a bar like this, let us know! The Darkley storytellers would love to gather at a watering hole like this one.

Happy Valentine's Day

Be mine?

Wishing all of our viewers a very happy Valentine's Day! Nothing says Valentine's and horror like the 1981, Canadian slasher My Bloody Valentine. So for all you horror lovers out there, be sure to give it a watch. There's nothing like a homicidal maniac on the loose to bring you and your significant other closer... Well, except for those couples in the movie. Read our review of My Bloody Valentine (1981), though we recommend that you do so after watching to avoid spoilers.

Since we've covered the original film last February, perhaps Don and myself will give the 3-D remake a watch this week. I'll reserve any doubting comments until we've seen it, but I will say that it does have Supernatural's Jensen Ackles. As my girlfriend Dara would remark, I've got a man-crush on the guy. What can I say? I took a real shine to him as Dean Winchester. Wish I had an older brother like him.

Oh, Jensen. You heartthrob, you. Can you do no wrong?
For the sake of My Bloody Valentine 3-D, let's hope so.

Black History Month: Bride of Blackenstein

Having been rather lax as of late with the Darkley Niche, it's time that we remedy that. With February being Black History Month, we're writing this article in regards to that theme. Expect more to come, touching on this.

Kenanan Thompson (right) and Jay Pharoah (left), who sounds an
awful lot like Wyatt Cenac as muppet Michael Steele ("bibbles" and all)

Nicki Minaj as the Bride of Blackenstein, brought to life

Saturday Night Live has a talent for making satirical commentary on various social circumstances, be they modern or past. In the case of their recent short skit, "Bride of Blackenstein," there is a bit of both. Drawing inspiration from the 1973 blaxploitation horror film Blackenstein, a.k.a. Black Frankenstein, this parody takes the next step by adapting Universal's The Bride of Frankenstein as if it were a sequel of the former. Now, not having seen Blackenstein for ourselves, we're only aware of the superficial traits and obvious stereotypes of the film.

So perhaps it is in poor taste that Saturday Night Live chose to use a derogatory genre for a comedy sketch. Then again, by mocking these racial stereotypes it points out the problems that were evident back then and, unfortunately, are still perpetuated in the film industry today in varying degrees. But then, does "Bride of Blackenstein" only succeed in exasperating this situation? It's a looping argument, which we won't allow ourselves to be drawn into.

Regardless of what your stance may be on the short itself, "Bride of Blackenstein" brings to mind the valid controversy surrounding Black, as well as Black women, stereotypes in cinema. It is in our personal opinion that if this was Saturday Night Live's actual intention, then they made good on it.

Additional Black History Month articles:

• Black History Month, part I (2010)
  
• Black History Month, part II (2010)

Mr. and Mrs. Death sketch card

Adapted from the video games of the same name, the Death Jr. graphic novels are amusing with their mix of small town suburbia and the macabre. Plus, it has had contributions by three amazing artists, namely: Mike Mignola (cover art), Ted Naifeh (interior illustrator), and Guy Davis (comic short). Anyway, the best example of this mismatched marriage is Mr. and Mrs. Death, parents of the story's protagonist, Death Jr. It's an odd match, but they're very sweet.

Purchase this original art for $25 USD, which comes in a plastic protector and includes no additional mailing costs. Contact me if interested.

Scary Christmas and Happy Anniversary!

Firstly, for us here at the Darkley Niche, this December is a memorable month. It was one year ago around mid-December that we, pardoning the pun, made our own niche on the internet. Perhaps we haven't contributed as much as we would've liked: occasionally missing certain dates or events, wanting that we had written more movie reviews, et cetera. But we've been learning an exceptional amount, especially from the various blogs that we ourselves watch. That will all prove invaluable when the actual Darkley comic starts to roll towards further development and production. Maybe within the next few months, if things fall into place the way that we hope. Keep your fingers crossed.

Moving on, today is Christmas Eve, so with that in mind we want to wish all of our viewers a very scary Christmas. May Cthulhu Claus bring you tidings of madness and woe!

illustration by Scott Brundage

composed by the H.P. Lovecraft Historical Society
for their album 'A Very Scary Solstice'

And if you're in the spirit for some holiday horror films befitting of this yuletide time, be sure to head on over to the Niche's Seasonal Horror Calendar. We've even added Hanukkah to the calendar recently, due to talk of a black comedy, slasher movie in the works. So soon there should be something for horrifying Hebrew and ghoulish goyim alike.

ZotB: Zombie Temp Worker

We here at the Darkley Niche have made no secret for our love of PopCap Games' Plants vs. Zombies. (And in case any of you were wondering, we've played through the full-fledged version and still stand by our original, five out of five garden-variety zombies score.) So when we learned of "Zombie Temp Worker," a series of short videos featuring one of PopCap's zombies at the office, well, we just had to watch. Here are a few, for your own viewing delight.

If you liked these, be sure to also see G4's zombie public service announcement video.

Supernatural: Children shouldn't play with Dead Things

For the past few weeks, I've begun watching Eric Kripke's paranormal drama television series, Supernatural. Needless to say, I'm loving this show. Perhaps if Darkly collaborator and good friend of mine, Don, is willing, he'll also give it a watch and share his input. -- I won't lie, part of the appeal to give Supernatural a try was Gilmore Girls' Jared Padalecki (Sam Winchester). I liked Gilmore Girls, so sue me. In Jared's defense, he has made cameo appearances in his fair share of horror films. Though after getting my feet wet in the series, I'd have to say that I happen to like Jensen Ackles (Dean Winchester) more. Sure he's your atypical tough guy, but he's just so damn funny at times. The witty banter and smart alec remarks are what makes Dean a likable character.

Getting to the heart of the matter, I've wanted to write a review on at least one of the episodes that I've seen thus far. After finishing the first season yesterday, and subsequently starting the second season as well, this fourth episode compelled me to write, today. Giving a nod to two personal favorites of mine within the horror genre, namely zombies (The episode title itself was a big tip-off. -- Refer to the film of the same name.) and author Stephen King, "Children shouldn't play with Dead Things" gives us something old and something new. (WARNING: spoilers ahead)

Hmmm. Must've been one hell of a small UFO.

With their father's death still green in memory, the Winchester brothers pay a long-overdue visit to their mother's grave. Already we're beginning to see parallels to zombie cinema, namely Night of the Living Dead. (Recall siblings Barbara and Johnny, who likewise visit a parent's grave.) While Sam buries their father's dog tags in a shallow hole beside the stone marker, Dean takes notice of a dead tree nearby in the cemetery. His curiosity is only further piqued when he notices that the tree touches a perfect circle of dead grass, encompassing the site of another grave. Dean suspects that it might be unholy ground and so the next paranormal hunt begins.

After some initial inquiry and talking to the survivors of the deceased, Angela Mason, the brothers learn that the young woman had recently died in a car crash. Everyone has a good word for Angela and protest that nothing but happiness and promise were present in her hastily-shortened life. This puts Dean's gut suspicion of Angela returning as a vengeful spirit into doubt. That is, until the Winchesters talk to Neil, Angela's male (heterosexual, by the way) BFF. It turns out that Angela's boyfriend had been fooling around behind her back with another girl, then was caught in the act. Said boyfriend, Matt, also apparently slit his throat later during their investigation, before either have the opportunity to question him. Neil claims that it was a guilty conscience that drove Matt to suicide, feeling personally responsible for Angela's death.

As is customary in their line of work, Dean and Sam visit Angela Mason's grave under the cover of darkness to burn her bones. Pouring rock salt on the remains as well, the combined acts are part of a purification ritual that permanently expels vengeful spirits. (Rock salt is even used as ammunition in their firearms, acting akin to silver bullets with werewolves, but only work as a temporary solution in this instance.) However, upon opening the unearthed coffin they find that the corpse is missing. Baffled, the brothers then catch sight of a strange inscription at the head of the casket interior. Dean recognizes the symbols from Dr. Mason's office, Angela's father and a college professor of Ancient Greek.

an Ancient Greek text in Dr. Mason's office

handwritten copy of the coffin inscription

Having done some homework at the library (because libraries are great receptacles of occult knowledge...), Dean and Sam learn that the inscription is part of an Ancient Greek divination ritual, namely a form of necromancy used for bringing a corpse back to life, "full-on zombie action," as Dean so eloquently puts it. Revisiting Dr. Mason at his house, Dean angrily accuses the professor of using this to resurrect his dead daughter. "I get it. There are people that I would give anything to see again, but what gives you the right? What's dead should stay dead!" This echoes Jud Crandall's sentiment from Stephen King's story, which is driven home when Dean adds, "I mean, come on! Haven't you seen Pet Sematary?"

"Sometimes dead is better." -Jud Crandall, Pet Sematary

As it turns out, however, Professor Mason isn't responsible. While any grieving parent would certainly have motive, the living, healthy green houseplants inside indicate otherwise. Like in the cemetery, her mere presence causes vegetation within the vicinity to wither and decay. It's an interesting contribution to zombie lore that hasn't been used in any film that I'm familiar with. As Dean describes it, the zombie "rots the ground around them."

It doesn't take long for Dean to finger the real culprit. Neil, who also happened to be Dr. Mason's teacher aide, had access to the same Ancient Greek, divination texts. As for motive, well, it comes as no surprise that a single, male friend might have alternative reasons to be a shoulder to cry on, other than just out of simple friendship. (That, and reading out of Angela's diary provided insight into Neil's "unrequited duckie love.") A little cliche? Sure, but it does happen. Although resurrecting a dead girl and keeping her locked in the basement makes Neil unique enough from the much-tried, typical archetype. I imagine that most can't make the same claim.

Can you say "necrophilia?"

The real problem lies in how to dispose of zombie Angela. Seems simple enough, right? "We can't just waste her with a headshot?" asks Dean, to which Sam replies, "Dude, you've been watching way too many Romero flicks. [...] I'm telling you that there's too much [lore]. I mean, there's a hundred legends on the walking dead, but they all have different methods for killing them." Everything from setting the zombie on fire to cutting out the heart and feeding it to wild dogs, Sam and Dean haven't the slightest clue on what to do. A few legends, though, suggest using silver to put down the zombie. It's a start at least, although personally I wouldn't rule out Dean's headshot idea just yet. Just saying, it couldn't hurt. (Well, them at least. Not so much Angela.)

"Hello? Neil? It's your grief counselors. We've come to hug." -Dean

Breaking and entering into Neil's house, the Winchester brothers find the residence empty, but also discover Angela's "zombie pen," which is likewise vacant. Deducing that the boyfriend's suicide was in fact a murder, Dean suspects that the adulteress in Matt's philandering is next in Angela's intended victims. Furthermore Lindsay, Angela's roommate, was unusually broken up over Matt's death, making her the likely target. Ouch, that has to hurt. No small wonder Angela was so frantic earlier, having walked in on her boyfriend whilst nailing her roomie. But before zombie Angela can learn how many painful ways there are to use a pair of scissors on Lindsay, Sam and Dean come to the rescue. Firing several silver bullets into her, the projectiles have some effect on the zombie, albeit very mild, and Angela escapes.

It's like Karen Cooper (Night of the Living Dead), if she was a catfighting, college girl.

It's alright, Miss, you're safe now. You will live to skank another day.

During the drive from Lindsay's house, Sam reads aloud that another solution might be "nailing the dead back into their gravebed," which he suggests is why staking vampires became a common notion. I can already imagine hardcore zombie fans and vampire fans having conniptions over this, but let's roll with it and move along. (Fun fact: Staking a vampire has no effect in Supernatural. The only sure-fire way of vampire disposal is decapitation.)

Arriving at Dr. Mason's office that same night, the Winchester brothers find Neil apparently sorting papers or performing some other arbitrary, teacher aide work. Despite their combined confrontation, which tends to mimic "Good Cop, Bad Cop," Neil plays dumb to the accusations. Part of this is from loving protection for Angela, we assume. But given that she was also hiding within earshot, odds are that the denials were made more from the fear of what she might do to him, otherwise. We never do see whether or not if he ultimately remained loyal, since his neck is violently broken out of pure suspicion. Chances are he probably would have left her, but it's not verified for us.

Before leaving Neil to his grisly fate, Dean fabricates a story of how they will perform a bogus ritual at her grave to eradicate zombie Angela. She takes the bait and eventually follows them back into the cemetery. While setting up the bogus ritual, Sam investigates a noise, which, surprise, turns out to be Angela. She makes crocodile tears to Sam, who keeps his firearm fixed on her. The plea doesn't convince him and conceding to Dean's earlier suggestion shoots her squarely in the forehead. Unfortunately, all that manages to accomplish is angering Angela. A chase ensues and Sam runs toward her grave, where Dean lies in wait and ambushes the zombie. Nailing her into the coffin with a silver stake, this method actually proves to have merit, and Dean finishes the job.

Would've wagered money on this one actually working. Guess not.

Dean nailing Angela. -- Wait, bad choice of words.

So was this my favorite interpretation of the zombie mythos? No. Did I find it to be an interesting interpretation? Yes. Like good storytellers, the original molds were still recognized, even outright citing Stephen King and George Romero within the episode, while the subject matter itself went in a direction that differentiated enough from its predecessors. This is the very reason why I was so impressed by Stephen King's novel, Cell, just to use an example. So I have to give Supernatural props for taking its own stance on the iconic zombie. I give it three-and-a-half out of five Deans. Why Dean? The real question ought to be, why not?